Do you ever find that silly little things can make you mad? Perhaps you sometimes get angry over things that happen by accident.
In the ‘Mental Juice’ session at my retreat this morning I was talking something that happened yesterday. It is something that if it happened to me that a few years ago would have had me livid. There is no doubt I would have been so angry that I would have been shouted numerous expletives and been in a foul mood for hours (or even days).
Yet, that didn’t happen. Instead I surprised myself with how calm I was.
If you’d been with me at my retreat in Turkey you would have seen me walking walking along in my shorts, t-shirt and flip flops, when suddenly I slipped.
I was walking past a swimming pool and then was suddenly very wet.
Not only did I fall into the water, I did so fully clothed and my iPhone was in my pocket.
My first thought (once I realised where I was) was that I needed to get my phone out of the water as quickly as possible.
I’d been carrying a glass bottle and it had landed on the floor beside the pool, smashing into sharp pieces.
I climbed out anyway, my hand touching some of the glass in desperation to try and avoid my phone being water damaged.
Out of the water, I promptly checked my phone. It was still working. Phew.
As I went to clean myself up, the staff cleaned up the glass.
The old me would have been angry. I was laughing.
A few hours later I was about to post a picture to Instagram. Black screen. Ouch.
Confused, I held the power button, hoping my phone would spring back to life. Nothing.
So suddenly, I am in another country and my phone (and everything on it) appears to be no more.
My reaction? Well, this is the bit that surprised me. Once again the old me would have been angry. Truth be told I’d have been looking for something or someone to blame. Why did I slip? Was the floor wet? Who was responsible for the water?
I would’ve been swearing my head off. Angry would’ve been an understatement. Yet, I was still calm.
It was only when I heard myself talking about the situation that I understood why. See, I described myself as a ‘little frustrated’ and the lack of phone as an ‘inconvenience’. In the past I would’ve used words like ‘f*cked off” and called the accident a ‘disaster’.
A f*cked off person with a disaster to deal with is anything but calm. Compare that to a person who is a little frustrated and inconvenienced and I think you get the picture of how different these situations are.
Thing is, both are the same situation. The difference is the meaning I chose to give to it and the language I used both internally and externally.
The language you use has the power to change your emotions in any situation. Choose your words wisely.
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